It’s Robert Goulet’s head on an ace card! Get it?? Whatever. This is dumb.

This is my *&#^@ Website

I’m Adrien Goulet (no, “Ace” isn’t my real name, comeon) and this is my damn website. I make things for the internet for a living so I guess it makes sense that I make something for the internet that represents me. Whatever.

I’m really just biding my time, creating things you can’t touch, taste or smell, until the massive solar flare hits and all of my years of work is wiped from existence (if it ever REALLY existed). Then I’ll ride off into the lawless apocalyptic wasteland, followed by a pack of loyal canine companions, and carve out my own piece of paradise by any means necessary.

I like my dogs more than I like most people.

Here are some things I've done

Rescued several canines from the clutches of evil, harnessed ancient Mayan magic to stop the world from ending, hiked through an active volcano, jumped out of several perfectly good airplanes, swam with 18 foot sharks, zip lined over several hundred foot chasms, spear tackled a minivan with a motorcycle whilst riding through steel canyons, used the power of my mind to heal a ruptured lumbar disc, became a beastmaster, went on a desert spirit quest.

I guess I’ve done some dev stuff too…

JK! That wasn’t a carousel. Carousels are dumb. No one should ever use them.

click it, dummy

Yes, I used pictures of my dogs. Big whoop, wanna fight about it?

Still Here? Ugh.

If you insist on knowing more about me, or god forbid, contacting me, here’s some stupid stuff that may help you. I’ll save you some time: I neglect most of this garbage except for Instagram and LinkedIn and my inbox. I have the cleanest inbox. I love deleting emails from people.